availability. effect

Self-Love Between Me, Myself, and I

Thursday, February 20, 2014 Kenny Muzzey

Honestly, I have been having a hard time starting this piece. It is not because I do not have any ideas. I have a great idea. However, I am having a hard time coming up with an attention grabbing topic sentence. Unable to think of something clever, funny, awe-inspiring, or witty, I've dismissed every idea I have had so far. Finding various faults within each line that pops into my head I grow increasingly more frustrated and think of all the things I could be doing instead.

With that being said, we will be discussing the self, ourselves, to be more specific. We all have faults, flaws, and experience faux pas, although some of us like to believe that we are prefect, which just isn’t the case. The human brain is an incredibly complex organ and a powerful tool. The brain, or brain processes, like most other tools, can be manipulated and used to perform tasks it was not meant for.

Each and every one of you has been in an awkwardly hilarious situation. I remember one time at work, I had been lifting something off a table to be placed on the floor and I heard this awful sound, the sound of my pants splitting. Like something out of a sitcom, they had ripped up my leg all the way across the back. This, of course, had happened in front of the business owner and a client. Quickly, I grabbed the back of my pants and scurried out of the room, my face a bright tomato red. At the time it had been a horrifying situation; today, a hilarious anecdote.

The point of my story reflects a concept deemed the 'spotlight effect.' Basically, this is an emphasis of doubt that we place on ourselves, we’d like to believe that more people noticed our bad hair day, or that silly slip of the tongue during our important presentation, or whatever your mind can muster up. In our heads, a lot of weight has been placed on the belief that those around us noticed our brief moment of embarrassment. What you need to take away from this information, is that you are not facing as much scrutiny under the spotlight as you would like to believe. With that being said, make your mistakes, brush them off and move on.

A similar theory, called the 'pratfall effect,' suggests that actually making mistakes will make others perceive you as more likable, where as those who ‘never’ make mistakes are usually seen as less likable. Again, after all, you are only human, and to err is human. Occasional slips are acceptable and can work for you in the long run. Of course, this concept is entirely dependent on the degree of the error, the frequency of them, and any compounding effects that happen.

There are all sorts of tricks and shortcuts our brain uses to make its job easier, two additional examples include 'stereotyping' and the 'availability heuristic.' So the purpose of this piece is to make you aware of these instances, to make you realise that it is okay to make mistakes, and finally, to grasp an understanding that you should not sell yourself short. Each and every one of us needs to show ourselves a little bit more self-assurance, a little less self-loathing, as we should strive for more confidence, because after all we are only human. We are all damaged people, flawed, imperfect, and impure by nature. Therein lies the truth. Within, we have different ways to cope, for you see, we all have skeletons, secrets that we hide. Hide from the damage that we have left behind. Through sadness, shame, and despair, each of us persevere. Wounds sustained, then healed, scars that remain, remind us of the pain and show us that we can make it though.

Halfstack Blogger & Photographer

Images provided are owned and copyrighted by http://choosingselflove.com and http://bodyinmindetox.com/.

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